Mom and dad never taught me how to swim

They tried… Let’s be fair.

Swimming classes and family members trying to make me and my sister understand how to

 “push water back”

 “breathe properly” 

“keep moving our legs” 

I don’t know….I just never got the hang of it.

And always thought that if I never go into a water body, I’ll never drown.

Won’t have  to keep moving my legs, breathe properly or push the water back.

I did learn to float though.

Just in case.

(What an idiot)

Well turns out you can drown. Even when you’re not in water.

Even when you’re walking, working, going to college, you can drown.

Drown in the work. Drown in the tasks, the projects, practicals, Dramas, duties, ambitions, aims, etc etc

I am drowning right now.

With so much to do and so much to learn in such short span of time.

Drowning in my own expectations, own demands, own feelings, own emotions and just my own life.

And I can’t push this water back, I can’t keep breathing properly and I can’t keep moving my legs.

I don’t know how to.

(And I don’t know whether it’s even possible)

Holding on desperately to the small boulders, trees, logs which are spread through out my river of life,

But my hands hurt…. And they all almost always become too tough to hold on to. And almost always, I leave them and crash into the next thing….

Out from one rapid into the other.

But I’m done now. Done holding on. Done trying to slow my river down.

Thank God I learned how to float.

I will be floating for a bit.

Its scary, floating. You don’t know what will happen, whom/what you’ll crash into, you’re not the  master, the water guides you.

But I am assuming, that it’ll be better than drowning. Or crashing.

So I’m gonna be floating for a while. Thank God I learned how to…..


Just Enjoy

Heyoo! Ssup?

Let’s start today’s post in a classic cable advertisment format! (Why? Well, just for fun!)

Are you bored with every task you do? Do you feel like you want to go on a long long loonnnnggg break? Do you try “new things” but still feel the “old way”? Are you feeling listless and uninspired? 

Well worry not! That’s it! Worry not! And ENJOYYYY.

What? What was that you ask? Let me explain

I used to feel the same way, I too did not want to live a boring uninspired life. But then….

I realised that….

I was forgetting to enjoy it!

(Okay, now normal tone please! :P)

With so much stuff and so many people around us, we tend to jump from one task to the other. The breaks in between are few (talking about mental breaks) and are usually consumed by different types of social media. Now by “tasks” I don’t mean only the things related to work. These tasks can be anything, from brushing your teeth to bathing, to watching TV etc. 

We often (dare I say usually) just complete what we’re doing and move on, during which we forget to enjoy! Believe it or not these mundane things can be super fun! In fact they are. It’s us who’ve lost the ability to have fun for we only either think about the million things that should be worried about or are busy in just somehow completing our daily goals one after the other. And even when we reach our “relaxation time” or something like that, we aren’t really relaxing or enjoying it. 

I am doing an internship which has me working with differently abled children. Many of them suffer from different things but they all have something in common. They enjoy like crazy when they’re playing games (or are made to think they are playing games) or doing stuff that they wanted. And they are so happy in that moment that it feels weird just looking at them. They squeal in happiness and laugh and just enjoy every second of it. 

So I took inspiration from these lovely kids and tried to enjoy. Turns out I suck at it for I have an attention span of a goldfish! But today in Yoga Camp (don’t freak out, its an online series, click here to check it out) the practice was to enjoy. That’s when I got the hang of it! And now….*sing-song* I’m standing in the rain, writing my blog, it’s sad for my phone, but I’m having funnnn! *end-sing-song*

Humans are so silly, they got a life, they got a brain, they were then placed on an amazingly big rock which is floating without any (visible) support in vacuum (or shall we say nothingness), and this rock has some really awesome features and things but they still can’t have fun and keep worrying about stuff that won’t even have a meaning after some time!

Anyways! I am disassociating with this sad and tensed human species and I’m gonna go enjoy my two baths (one in rain, and the other cause my mum will kill me if she knew I’ve been out in the rain again). You decide what you want for yourself today! 

See yaa! Bbye! 💜

P.S. I just realized that this post reminds me of a song which used to be my favorite… The Show by Lenka! (Google here I come)

Motivation For you and for I

Hey there.

If you’re having a hard time and feeling lost…I just want to say, Don’t give up just yet. Seriously! Don’t! I know you’ve heard this billions of time and probably told yourself this billions of time but listen to it once again. Tell yourself this once again. You’ll probably say it’s crazy tough to keep going on, well that’s only true if you believe it to be true. 

Let the anxiety and negativity go. Let the feeling that you’re failing go. Let the expectations you have from yourself go. And you, you keep going on. 

Anf if you’re in the same boat as me, lost, confused, and somewhat screwed. Don’t fear! Dig deep! Organise! Believe! And start what you want to! Do what you need to! Be what you have to! And don’t stop until the thing that you wish for is right in front of you.

Pretty soon this phase will go away. (Or atleast change) and then you’ll be happy that you did not lose spirit. 

But most of all. Stop being so serious! Enjoy where you’re at! Find what feels good! And all will be well!💜

A Love Letter to Rain

Stay today rain. Heal us. Cool us down. Make the winds dance and make the drops drizzle. 

Dear Rain

I’ve been calling you. 

Again and again and again.

I know you’ve been busy flirting with the clouds. But they always ditch you don’t they? Throw you to the earth mercilessly! Can’t you see how dark they are?

Why don’t you get it? It’s us who love you! Who miss you. It’s us who despite our miserable existence lighten up when you rustle the leaves of our trees! It’s us who stay ready with pakoras and tea to welcome you to our humble aboard! And yet you go away! 

Do you know what the heat’s been doing? It’s killing people. Making us mad! Making us angry and sad! Everything is burned! 

Stay today rain. Heal us. Cool us down. Make the winds dance and make the drops drizzle. But don’t cause destruction. Don’t be angry today for we can use some love and happiness. In fact, we need a day out with our loved ones, just enough for a lovely coffee. 

We love you rain (well those of us who’re sane!). So please stay. Stay for a while. It’s good to have you here! You’re the best!


A rain-crazed earthling! 💜

Thoughts under the Moon

If only we stop humanising everything

Here I am once again, wishing for a power cut

To the streetlight I want to say goodbye

So that I’m left alone, in this light breeze and calming moonlight.

So that I forget I’m human, and I have to lead a chaotic life.

So that at the stars I can gaze, peacefully tonight.
It’s almost full moon

The sky is as clear as it can be. 

If only we stop humanising everything,

We can have moonlit silver bodies.

Maybe the stars will guide me, If I can find some in this pollution

Maybe I would’ve been free, If I wasn’t a human.

Maybe I’d have enjoyed much more, If I wasn’t human!

Magic Isn’t Lost!

Magic isn’t lost!
These muggles lie
This moment, this life
Are magical, I swear.

You need to look you need to trust
Believe and respect the Universe!

Embrace the moment and never forget
You’re a stack of meat and bones
Walking on a flying planet!

These muggles they’ll tell you
Get real, grow up
They do that, you see
They’ve been duped by situations.

But magic is here,
It’s not difficult to find
Your eyes can see it
Try changing your mind!

And when you find it,
Enjoy till you drop,
And then tell your friends,
That magic isn’t lost..

(Photograph : Aakriti Hans)

Aprajita Rana


But I am stuck here with one vessel
Finite, in an infinite world.

The morning sky
The wet grass
They’re infinite.

In number, in presence
In space and being
They are uninhibited.

Onism*, sorrow,
A nagging feeling
I am not enough
To live and see
All the gardens, animals and trees.

I wish I had 10-20 bodies
I could’ve gone and seen much more
But I am stuck here with one vessel
Finite, in an infinite world.


(*Onism :the frustration of being stuck in just one body, that inhabits only one place at a time.
This poem was inspired by a YouTube video which I happened to watch the other day for I was intrigued by the title. Click here to watch it)

Picture Credits: AAKRITI HANS

We’re going on….

It’s a 160 second red light for a 30 second green. Makes no sense does it? To wait! Wait for your turn.
But to be fair you’re already late. Late for that meeting/class/other things Monday has brought along with it. So in a perfect pandemonium of cars, buses, scooties, bikes, trucks, rikshaws, autos and cycles, let’s just take our chances. Let’s jump the light! Let’s go to the extremes of the road, the point where the footpath is half an inch away, and overtake the person in front. Ofcourse, we don’t know each other and probably never get to either. But i’ll beat him/her atleast. Who cares about the consequences. Hell we don’t even know what they could be. Let’s just go. Get going. Keep going. And keep going yet. We’re just some humans amongst other humans with stuff to do and things to achieve. We don’t know what we will do with them. Or what does anything mean. Why does anything exist. But we just need to keep going. So there, now we’ve crossed another light. And still we’re going on………

Aprajita Rana

A walk in the park

Don’t you feel weirdly calm, when you come across an unexpected epiphany in daily chores and activities? I know I do.
I recently started going for morning walks. Mainly because of two reasons, I should probably mention here:
One…its summer vacation and i have a lot of free time (plus I get bored)
Second…it gives me an excuse to laze around all day guilt free 😛

So, yesterday, I was for some apparent reason really motivated and walking briskly in the not so little park behind my building. This obviously means that I was worn out in a few rounds (for if you know me, you know brisk walking, or walking in general ain’t my thing).
Now, when my fire doused, (which was soon) i continued my trek but now really slowly and in just a few minutes I realised how beautiful that park really was.



Few clicks of what I saw. But it was more than this.

A beautiful web, intricately and strategically woven between two branches with the thread so thin and delicate that the camera refused to capture it with the owner spider claiming the center for himself like it’s his throne.

A di-colored lizard with spikes down the back and a royal dragon face, concentrating on some unknown creature in grass with one foot up, almost like a yoga pose. (Too bad it ran away before getting it’s picture taken)

The best of all were the sweet smelling flowers all around and sunlight sifting through the branches of these flower laden trees touching the grass and you with it’s early morning gentleness.


It was here when I actually realised that everything we look at, all our surroundings, our environment, basically everything gets its definition from our perception. Most of the time it is us who perceive them as hostile or friendly, or for that matter beautiful or ugly. It is our perception, of our environment that gives it a definition.

And it was here when I actually understood why “slow down” is a pretty common advice of all spiritual/self help materials. Just moments before when I was trying to walk as fast as I can I did not even notice where I was, what I was doing, rather what I was missing. I was oblivious of the beauty around me. But when I slowed down, and actually looked around this seemingly normal place became a paradise.

I think that’s all we need, slowing down, slowing down to tread troubled waters…

Aprajita Rana

Just a reminder!

It’s crazy, how long it has been since i wrote something-something down, and irritated all my friends by sending them links and requesting feedbacks! The truth is that I had 3-4 topics to write on! These are topics that i like, like to read about, think about, know about! So why isn’t this post about them? Well, let’s just say…..it’s drizzling, there’s crazy wind blowing out here and the lightening is almost like a dance, one after another, rapid lightening which is scary and pretty at the same time. And even though any sane person would classify this as dangerous, i somehow find it soothing, calming, even romantic!
And sitting out here has made me realise, Im not the “5 things” person/writer!
My ideas are abstract, probably useless, but they are what they are! And today I just want to utilise this blog post to remind myself Im a poet! Im a crazy idea, unorganised, romantic poet for whom writing is a way to let go! And this poet should not restrict herself, should not write what she doesn’t believe in, what she doesn’t feel in the deepest corners of her soul!
I’m not a professional, i may never be! But i know i don’t want to be one unless what I write resonates with me!
So I vow to never post anything that I’m not in love with, or something that does not give me satisfaction. Isn’t everything already too stressful? This doesn’t need to be a work! It’s my therapy and i don’t want that few months down the line, I start detesting this.

Okay! So I should shut up now!
K.thanks.bye 🙂

Aprajita Rana